Computer definitions:

486                - The average IQ needed to understand a P.C.
State-of-the-art   - Any computer you can't afford.
Obsolete           - Any computer you own.
Microsecond        - The time it takes for your
                     State-of-the-art-computer to become obsolete.
Syntax Error       - Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.
GUI (gooey)        - What your computer becomes after spilling your
                     coffee on it. 
Computer Chip      - Any starchy food stuff consumed in mass quantities
                     while programming.
Keyboard           - The standard way to generate computer errors.
Mouse              - An advanced input device to make computer errors
                     easier to generate.
Floppy             - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.
Hard Drive         - The sales technique employed by computer  salesmen.
Portable Computer  - A device invented to force businessmen to work at
                     home, on vacation and on business trips.
Disk Crash         - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.
Power User         - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.
System Update      - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.